"Bitch I look like Goku"

I like this kid but a part of me feels bad, because I sort of see a past version of myself in this kid: the escapist, I have no friends, the internet is the only place that accepts me parts. But on the other hand: bahahahaha. What a dumb fuck! I like Dragon Ball Z too, even though it never really delivered on anything and Mr. Popo made me pretty uncomfortable, but I’m pretty sure I never ripped my shirt off my emaciated sad sack torso and screamed bloody murder trying to go super saiyan in my bedroom.

It appears that I was not missing out on anything good. There is a high probability that this is not real, but I’m just going to disregard that and continue to know that, no matter what, this dude’s day was probably way worse than mine. With 90,000 views and counting, this dude “The Secreted” himself into fame alright, but it wasn’t for saving the world from Vegeta. It was for looking like a dingus. Thanks internet.

HUGH.

God damn look at that garment. You know the one I’m talking about. The majestic and wonderfully buoyant looking fur puffball that somehow encircles the massive corpus of one Rick Ross as he stands in a wind tunnel/Maybach storage space. That coat sums up Rich Forever perhaps better than any song or video. I want that fucking coat!

Surrounding the coat is a delightful new video for Rich Forever standout “MMG Untouchable.” Following up last week’s amazing and goofy “Yella Diamonds” video, we sure have gotten an eyeful of Richard’s heaving bosom recently. Though this time he is, more or less inexplicably, accompanied by Timbaland, who makes that dumb Timbaland face like he does. Is this a sign that they’re working on music? Please?

Good for Health

So it’s about to be the 30th Anniversary of Akira and what better way to celebrate then with replica jackets? Normally this kind of thing would be a little too cosplay-eee for my liking but this, this is THE exception to the rule. I mean, who the fuck DOESN’T want Kaneda’s jacket from Akira?

Bandai Namco is offering the jacket in both red AND black. You can order them here BUT you will need two things….an understanding of Japanese text AND $900. But that’s not too bad right? That’s what Rosetta Stone and Robbery are for.

They Don't Make em' Like They Used to.

 I was shown an image a while back of NBA finals runner-up LeBron James lounging out on a regal throne, flanked on either side by a trio of actual lions. The Heat forward was the picture of royalty in most respects, appearing about as smug as the supposed greatest-living-basketball-player has every right to look. While LeBron’s recent actions and overall demeanor have at times thrown me into a fit of rage, there’s just no disputing the fact that the dude has a knack for sniffin’ out a killer photo shoot… even if his headband has been creeping ever-northward since the first time he stepped out on NBA hardwood (you have to get your shots in were you can.).

Anyway, this specific image immediately sent me into a downward spiral of sports-themed nostalgia and reminiscence. I was reminded of a particular vintage poster featuring former Atlanta Falcons Guard Bill Fralic, where he’s pictured perched atop a similar looking throne, set in between a pair of ritzy looking hound dawgs. I started thinking of the days when superstar athletes didn’t bat an eye at the notion of dressing up in a wacky, potentially demeaning, ensemble, all in the name of selling a few posters. If you were born at any point throughout the 80′s I’m sure you know the type of promo shot I’m referring to. In an age when Adobe Photoshop was just a geeky pipe-dream, pro’s had to really go for it when the studio flashbulbs started to burst.

After firing up the Google Image Search, I was quickly immersed into the bizarre world of old school sports merch. The shots I tracked down suggested that professional league PR departments were on some laid back tip throughout most previous decades. So many of theses posters either featured an athlete wielding a gun, or implied that the athlete in question was prone to gunning down foes out on their respective playing surface.

Check out the size of that piece in the Chuck Person shot! There’s no way this type of shit would fly in the current buttoned up social climate we now reside in, and it’s kind of unfortunate. What I wouldn’t pay for a Gilbert Arenas poster featuring the dude in his finest sweat pants, propped up in front of a poker table, toting a couple of hand guns.

You can check out more of these posters, in all their absurd glory, in a slide show posted by Coed Magazine. Not only do most of the photos feature an athlete dressed in something border-line humiliating, but also usually present whole bunches of lame props in the background. These props only tangentially correlate to the actual athlete in question, but over time, became a real linchpin in the completion of one of these photo shoots. Just look at the heap of crap that populates the supposed back yard of Bob “Mad Dawg” Golic. I would have personally liked the props master here to include some refference to Golic’s time spent acting on Saved By The Bell: The College Years, but I suppose you can’t have it all.

Sadly, in recent times, this outrageous brand of poster has gone the way of the giant-headed athletic caricature t-shirt. Which is to say, these things just aren’t produced anymore. In this less-is-more, Terry Richardson-dominated photographic climate, it seems that most folks want to fix their gaze on a smartly dressed superstar set in front of a stark backdrop. History tends to repeat itself, however, so lately I’ve been counting down the days untill Blake Griffin get’s photographed straddling a motorcycle, dressed like the Terminator. I can truly picture it now.

Take Care...

One of the things people forget when considering albums, is that they work best in very specific scenarios. Taken out of their comfort zones they can sound silly, confusing and generally shitty. Let’s say you have an r&b/rap record about love, how should you consume it? Within that specific genre there’s a ton of variation, some joints celebrate new love, others celebrate sex, some are breakup records and then there’s records that exist entirely in the “what if” world of unrequited love. Within each of those subgenres come very specific caveats on how it should be experienced for optimal affect. Drake’s Take Care doesn’t quite fit into any of the genres mentioned above. Instead it’s a confusing mix of baseless shit talking and emotionally bare pandering. If there was a specific moment where this album would sound entirely appropriate, it would be getting dressed in your freshest outfit to checking on your ex's Facebook while sobbing gently. Simultaneously leaving vaguely poetic and emo messages on a photo of her in a bikini “…remember when we went swimming in the summer? I love’d it when your hair was still wet…” while writing amorphously boastful tweets about how you’re “killing the game.” If you’re in that very specific situation and mind frame, Take Care might be the most affecting piece of art since you saw The Notebook.

Honestly, Drake is not inherently a bad rapper. He has a simple flow that works for pop rap and more importantly he has a good ear for melody. When he’s not jocking the worst parts of Wayne’s flow he’s enjoyable. Put together, he’s essentially an A&R’s dream for pushing records. The problem is that he consistently makes records aimed exclusively at emotionally unstable dudes trying to get their swag back or Catholic schoolgirls trying to get into the head of “that cute boy from school.” If you’re not in those two camps, his lyrics come off as a bit juvenile and at times, almost intentionally bad. On this album he’s apparently taken a liking to spoken word poetry that immediately takes you out of the moment, unless you’re the type to take fortune cookie musings as profound. “May your neighbors respect you, trouble neglect you, angels protect you and heaven accept you.” Word dude.

To the album’s credit, it sounds amazing. It’s filled with beautifully composed down tempo joints that feel lush and melancholy without getting too heavy into musical melodramatics. A track like “The Real Her” takes the minimalism of Ye’s 808s & Heartbreak and cuts it with some of the slower tracks from The-Dream’s catalog. “Crew Love” sprinkles some of The Weekend’s coke dream r&b over a standard Drake track and makes a joint that sounds both appropriate for the party and the after party. If you’re lucky enough to be the type of person that can just tune out a vocalist and appreciate the mood and ambiance of the tracks, fuck with this album on some come down shit or maybe when you’re driving around in your car while thinking about heavy shit. The instrumental for “Marvin’s Room” is great for that kind of thing. “Practice” is essentially a remake of “Back Dat Azz Up” but with all the Bounce energy sucked out of it. Surprisingly, the track doesn’t sound like shit. In the hands of a dude like The-Dream it could be a pretty awesome flip talking about the downside of a relationship that’s spawned after a fine motherfucker backs that ass up. The-Dream would probably find someway to incorporate motherfucker in a really endearing way. “Shot For Me” has a beautifully haunting melody to it. Unfortunately, Take Care is not an instrumental album.

Rap works heavily on how interesting your created character is. Clipse created compellingly reflective and morally ambiguous drug dealers, Wayne created an alien pop culture savant and Ye created a former everyman who became a tortured artist/prince. All of these characters are at their base, interesting characters. You’d want to get a beer with any of those dudes. Drake’s character at best estimation, is an emotionally open dude who’s also wildly popular and successful. While that character makes for a dude who’d probably treat your sister real well and take care of her, storybook relationships are not the type of thing that makes for awesome rap songs.

so far gone

At some point last eve, perhaps around midnight or so, a distant corner in the far reaches of the Greater Good room was lit by the dim yellow glow of a tired old lamp. Hushed whispers punctuated the soft warbling of the new leaked Drake record in the background. I decided to give up on everything.

that's just sad.

Consequence is getting ready to drop a Kanye West exposè. Yes, you just read that right.

While my early 90's leanings may by default make me a fan of some of the verses Consequence has uttered over the course of his largely depressing career, this little action right here, I cannot excuse. So with the Blind Fury of someone who spends too much time around a keyboard, I must respond in the only way I know how.

I have a vivid imagination. So when I see something like the embedded video above, I can't help but think about what Consequence has gone through in his nearly twenty year "career."

First of all, Consequence is Q-Tip's cousin. Which raises immediate questions as to why he was allowed a guest verse on Beats, Rhymes, and Life in the first place. In my mind, Q-Tip and/or Phife Dawg probably absconded with Consquence's girl at some point during the heydey of their popularity, and in return they gave their little cousin a chance to hop on a record.

Little did they know that in doing so they were creating an eternal Cousin Skeeter (with voice to match) who would could ride coat tails with the proficiency of a porn star and play the background like a poorly constructed seventh grade school set.

After living off of hype generated from guest verses on Tribe songs for the better part of a decade, Consequence is somehow miraculously still here and still being a nuisance. Consequence is sometimes, but not really, maybe on Wednesdays, but definitely not on stage a member of G.O.O.D. music. He calls the label his "crew." And with the deft of a Shaolin Master with a degree in the "Da Mystery of Coattailin' " he sometimes appears on tracks, in videos, and with varying frequency releases his own music that admittedly isn't always offensive to the ears.

Both of the fake Kardashian sisters pictured above are wondering how and why Kanye West's body guard hopped in the picture. Oh wait.



But what the hell is this? Dissing Kanye West? Airing his personal business? Publicly exposing the man who has kept you barely relevant by the very last strand of "Oh-yeah-he-was-pretty-cool-in-the-90's-nostalgia?" Kanye West, the man who has kindly has built a patio towards the rear end of his coat upon which Consequence has been allowed to erect a small mansion?

I'm thoroughly disgusted.

My favorite part of the video is when Consequence attempts to justify his actions by stating that every and anyone, friends, family or foes, all want "the crown." Is Peter Jackson creative directing Consequence's career now? Is this the fourth installment of Lord of the Rings?

Consequence talking about "the crown," is like Jared Jeffries talking about how he wants to come back next season and be the best big man in the NBA. Get out of here dude. Not only will it never happen (Like Donald Trump co-signing Barry O's birth certificate), it should never even be conceived to happen. (Like Lil Wayne impregnating Lauren London.)

The complete lack of respect and friendship here is just sad. This isn't a complete vindication of Kanye West either, he's long been known to pick up someone's career, issue words of bravado and soon to come success and then proceed to leave them quietly waiting in one of the many Art Deco hallways that probably litter his home. Just ask Mr. Hudson who is now serving Manhattans and Heinekens as the resident G.O.O.D. Music butler.

I'm sure Kanye didn't play fair. And I'm sure there is more to the story. But Consequence is like the drunk Uncle at the family barbeque who just won't leave. There's a certain line you just don't cross, and Cons managed to take a Hulk sized leap across the border. For hip-hop's sake, I hope Ye' keeps it moving and Consequence starts thinking about the next stage in his career. UPS has been hiring since B.I.G. left us and Mr. Hudson could probably use a hand in the kitchen.

CSL

I remember when that movie “500 Days of Summer” came out, and a bunch of media outlets were saying that it was one of the first romantic-comedies to be made with the guy in mind. I took the bait and checked it out. As it turns out, those media outlets were full of crap and the critics who said it was the first romantic-comedy for guys are obviously some sucker-for-love men who are still tripping about that one girl in high school who wouldn’t give them any type of play.


In the months and days leading up to the release of “Crazy, Stupid, Love” (which comes out in theaters today), I heard no such thing. Nobody was saying this was a romantic-comedy made with the man in mind, so imagine my surprise when watched a bootleg copy last night (compliments to my sister).
“CSL” succeeds at being a romantic-comedy guys can get into because it doesn’t make love soft or easy, as most men who have been in love know it to be. I imagine a lot of this has to do with the fact that the film is the work of not one but two male directors, Glenn Ficarra and John Requa. It’s as though they were trying to fit in every experience they had or heard about love and marriage through each of the three male protagonists.

There’s the young, naive idealistic love found in the teenage Robbie (played by Jonah Bobo). There’s the jaded, cynical, I-never-want-to-fall-in-love-because-I-did-I-got-hurt-and-it-sucks from the middle-aged Cal (played by Steve Carrell) who from the very beginning is trying to figure out how to deal with divorcing his wife (played by Julianne Moore). And then there’s the love-is-for-lames ethos of Jacob (played by Ryan Gosling) who tries to help Cal get over his divorce by pushing him into the lion’s den of bachelorhood.

Eventually, we see the two switch places. Jacob falls in love, Cal gets fully acclimated to the life of a bachelor, becoming a bonafide ladies man. Both depictions are as honest as I’ve ever seen, and intertwining the evolution of their attitude adjustments is what provides the balance most romantic-comedies are missing.

I would pay money to watch “Crazy, Stupid, Love”, and not just matinee money, full-price, Friday-night-date-night-order-the-tickets-in-advance-on-Fandango-and-pay-the-extra-service charge money. The reason I enjoyed the movie is because it wasn’t short-changing me when it came to emotional range and that’s the problem with most male characters in romantic comedies. I don’t want to see a man fall in love with a girl to the point where he can’t keep it together and loses damn near everything else in life, because that’s not honest. I don’t want to see a man whose heart is so cold he can’t manage to fall in love with the perfect woman even though she’s staring at him right in the face, because that’s not honest. And I definitely don’t want to see the movie where the man eventually gets the girl because he worked out whatever issues he had, because that’s not honest either.

In real life, we don’t always get the girl, it’s not always our fault, and if we do always get the girl, we might want to find a way to keep her instead of trying to get another one. Love is hard and complicated and dealt with in different ways by different men. “Crazy, Stupid, Love” understands that.

Varsity.Letterman

What began as and continues to be a representation of high school and college student's pride in their school and team, the Varsity Jacket displays personal achievements in athletics, academics and other school activities. The letter of the schools initial(s) is emblazoned on the left breast of what is usually a wool jacket with leather sleeves and a band collar. With such distinction attached to the Varsity Jacket, mens wear lines throughout the years have sought to emulate the classic design. It's so nice to have these available since I didn't do shit in HS or College...

Like I said in my last post, I've picked up a few new jackets. A Supreme and the other Aeropostale...yeah i know right? random. Most Lettermans have a thick wool body and white leather sleeves but isn’t it about time for a breath of fresh air? Either way we’re pretty sure none of your high school varsity jackets looked anything like P.O Ceremony reinvented version... correct?

Complete with a vivid Incan-inspired woven pattern and brown leather sleeves (also available with black leather sleaves)

i bet i can rock this shit.

A Not So Glorious Return.

Man oh man! If I could shake the hands of all you bastards I surely would. You’ve asked, questioned, demanded and if I could rack up seventeen pennies for each time I’ve been harassed about what the deal with The Greater Good is, I wouldn’t be a rich man, but I’d probably have enough for a decent sized burrito.

But I'm back. How crazy of a feeling is that? You’re reading a full blown Greater Good blog post right now. In August of 2011. That’s less expected than an awkward seven footer from Germany showing up to ruin The Big 2.5 in Miami’s Championship’s dreams. But yet folks, here we stand. And it’s a happy moment.

Me? Well, if you haven’t been keeping up on Twitter, I’ve pretty much been doing the same thing I’ve always been doing. With a fair degree of fresh Varsity jackets liberally mixed into the proceedings. Still Working, Going back to school in the fall, still coupled with my loving girlfriend, my kiddo just started 2nd grade. Life is good... 

But pretty much old friends, it’s STILL summer time. And that means a dusty pair of broken Vans Authentics makes their debut from the closet and things get a whole lot more fun.

Do What We Can.

Every once and a while we all get a chance to make a contribution to something greater. When something as awful as the earthquake that took place Friday, March the 11th occurs it falls upon the shoulders of each and every one of us to contribute where able, and however possible.

For those that don’t know, I spent about three and a half years of my life in Japan (Atsugi) with my family. Japan is in a desperate situation and the coverage and news emanating from the country is nothing short of heart shattering.

I still have good friends (and their families) living in Fukushima, Tokyo, and Yokosuka, all about 110 miles away from the epi-center of the quake, so it is needless to say that this disaster is hitting as close to home as possible. If it is possible for you to do something to help, then I would ask with complete sincerity that you do what you can.

Thousands are going to be dead when the rubble finally clears and the waters calm, and that is only going to be the very beginning of the problems. I’d encourage you to take a second and donate just $10 to any one of the causes accepting donations for relief in Japan. It's your chance to have an effect in an area that desperately needs it.

Donate to the Red Cross here.

Another Day Another Struggle

“Cause G-E-D, wasn’t B-I-G

I got P-A-I-D, that’s why my moms hate me

She was forced to kick me out, no doubt

Then I figured out licks went for twenty down South.”

The Notorious BIG was shot today in 1997 at 12:30. Truly an originator and truly one of the best.

rest in peace.

Girls Night Out. 4 things.

Girls night out is every guy’s nightmare. Trust me when I tell you. No man likes it when his woman is getting all dressed up to go and hang out with her girlfriends surrounded by a bunch of other guys who are not us. I know we may act like we want our girl to hang out with her girlfriends, but really, it makes us nervous.we will encourage a woman to go out and have a good time and try to act like we can use the space too, but honestly, we’d much rather her go take a walk to anywhere but a bar or a lounge.

So now that I have divulged this little secret, allow me to suggest a solution as to how to make girls night out a comfortable night for the man in her life. Actually, make that four suggestions.

DO IT DURING BIG GAMES

Especially during football season, depending on the team a man roots for, there are some great opportunities for a woman to make plans with her girls. Don’t get me wrong, I love it when Aimee can sit down and watch a game with me, but I’m never mad at the her when she says she’s going to do her own thing during the time the game is on. That shows she’s thinking. What shows she is not thinking? Going out with her girls on a night where nothing is on television for me to watch. I mean, come on, ladies! Everyone knows Friday night television hasn’t been good since they canceled Full House and Family Matters! Why don’t women think about these things? Now I’m over here pacing the floor, looking out the window every time I see some headlights flash all while watching ESPN News loop the same highlight reel over and over again.

AT DINNER, SHE CAN CALL AND ASK HIM IF HE WANTS HER TO BRING ANYTHING HOME

Aside from the obvious common courtesy a woman demonstrates when she calls up her man and asks him if he wants her to bring anything home, this gesture is also somewhat of an insurance policy for men. It’s a way of saying, “No matter what happens tonight, I’m coming home to my man.” Besides, I also know no man wants to talk to the girl carrying the to-go container of food, especially if it’s one of those pungent dishes. So yes, I absolutely will take the chicken yellow curry. Thanks, baby.

SHE SHOULD ACT LIKE SHE DOESN’T WANT TO GO OUT, LIKE SHE DIDN’T HAVE FUN

Before she leaves the house, the only thing I want to hear my woman talking about is how much she is dreading the upcoming festivities. Say things like, “I can’t believe my girl has me hitting these streets with her. I told her all I wanted to do was spend the night inside with my man. And then I lost a bet. Can you believe that baby?” I will believe it, because I’m gullible like that and a woman needs to take advantage of that by lying to me and acting like she doesn’t want to be with her girls at some spot where some other guys are giving her all this attention.

SHE NEEDS TO GIVE HER MAN SOME…RIGHT BEFORE SHE LEAVES

And when I say right before, I mean, grabbing the keys, three steps from walking out the door, right before. I want to do it when her hair is done, the makeup is applied, and the heels are on. And we don’t even have to lay down. We can stay standing. But yes, we need to do this right now, and she needs to text her friends that she will be outside in three minutes. Three minutes later, I give her a kiss and simply say, “Have fun with your girls.”

theres a lot of these guys at clubs and bars.

Happy Birthday MJ.

U-N-I and HellaTight.

check Bambu at 1:01

SUPREME and WTAPS

Check out this revirsible jacket collaboration between two of my favorite clothing lines.

 

 

The Art of Choosing.

Not having a job at the moment is a trip...I have so much time on my hands, as you can see with my video choice today...no pun intended.

Breezy Style

Breezy Art...Style from Mechanical Dummy on Vimeo.

Topsiders.

Salutations all! I had a job interview today in the downtown area. Things went well and im pretty sure they'll be calling me back in the next few days but, im not here to talk about that. Due to my shitty sense of direction I got lost and wound up in the Hillcrest area which wasn't bad 'cause it gave me the chance to check out a shoe store that me and my good brethrens Dave and Sandwich used to frequent.  

I saw these Sperry Topsider boots on sale for $80 and fell in LIKE...

Donald Glover: Actor, Writer, Model, Rapper

good looking out Marvin.